Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Tuesday is Gardening day!

With so much rain around ( sorry to all those not getting any) the garden is really getting away from me. But it looks like today I will get to spend most of the day in there weeding and planting and cutting back. I cut all the plants in my garden back by a half to two thirds twice a year
once in late October (so I get a full flush of flowers for Christmas) and then again in April to help them get through our dry winters. This year I am cutting back earlier than I usually would because the growth has been staggering, so I will have bundles of cuttings of pentas, lavendar, daisies, hibiscus, plumbago, duranta and some roses to give away and to replant in the few bare spots that have been claimed by the weeds.
For those who follow the Catholic way of thinking you will know it is Lent our children have given up all kinds of things for lent - playstation (no big deal there as it is packed away during the school term anyway) chocolate (this is a biggie daisyboy7 LOVES chocolate he wouldn't even take a lamington to school for morning tea today) - what will power and strength of conviction he has for a 7 year old he can't even have a chocolate cake for his birthday.
I keep thinking it must be luck that I have these great kids but more and more I see that we live very differently from other families. We have always expected our children to pitch in and help, we have always expected to be respected by our children, we have always done everything we can to encourage them to chase and catch their dreams ( as opposed to doing it for them).
Now that I am working my greatest fear is losing some of that of letting them down because it is easier to give in than stand your ground and watch them fail (which is after all how we all learn - from our mistakes) I see more and more guilt ridden parents doing everything for their children to make up for the fact that they are working and have less time to spend with them. One mum told me the other day that it was easier for her to do her year 10 sons homework assignments and have him pass so they can spend more time together on the weekends - what she fails to see is that he leaves home at 7am Saturday morning and goes motorbike riding all day getting home at 5pm and then Sundays he spends locked in his room chatting on msn and grunting as he passes anyone on the way to the kitchen - how is this spending time? how is he learning anything?
She then went on to tell me that she pays a lot of money in school fees and couldn't afford for him to fail and have to repeat....... apparently he gets enough marks from his assignments to assure a pass ...I wonder if she will do his uni assignments as well, and fill in his dole application??? I was so angry when I left that conversation and I wondered if time will turn me into one of those parents?
But the thought of turning lose on society an adult who can't read, write, cook, clean, dress themsleves and get themselves organised is repugnent. Surely a parents job is to nuture a whole human being not stunt them into a childlike dependance for the rest of their lives.
end of rant have a great day
daisymum

4 comments:

Joolz said...

Hi DaisyMum

Its raining here too today! Probably only gonna get about 5 mls but that is better than nothing and will settle the dust. It is humid and windy too which is really wierd. Will pop back later to read your extra long post - just got time to load dishwasher, shower then off to work. Would much rather surf blogland instead.

Cheerio - Joolz

The Old Dairy said...

We had a shower late yesterday that cooled things down a bit.
The garden is a busy time in autum isn't it with all the prunning and planting that goes on.
I don't think that you have to worry about turning into the kind of Mother that does her childrens homework....funny how some peope think though isn't it....
Have a great day.
Mandy

Unknown said...

Hi Joolz have a great day at work.

mandy I wouldn't have the time to fit in my kids homework anyway!!!LOL

daisymum

Joolz said...

Hi DaisyMum

I know K18 is still in the honeymoon period but I am seeing the fruits of my rantings and grumblings about picking up, putting away, keep your room tidy, wipe up that spill on the bench, put your clothes out to the wash, pick up that towel, don't leave your shoes lying there, are they your breakfast dishes left there, how can I wash it if its under your bed, why didn't you tell me you needed it dry to wear in half an hour......
She is finding living with 3 strangers a bit different to living in my household. They do all of the above things and it is irking her. He he he! She is realising that it is a pain when the sink is full of someone elses dishes after she just tidied the kitchen, the dishwasher is full but hasn't been run, crap left lying around. It didn't bother her when it was her crap in my house but it is starting to get to her now that she has to deal with it at her place. I love it.

Her first day went well yesterday, although she got drenched waiting for the bus (note to herself - buy an umbrella!).

I have never contemplated doing my kids homework (maths - wouldn't have a hope in hell of understanding it anyway)but I always offered to proof-read essays etc and help with grammar. Somehow, the use of commas and apostrophes has flown out the window. They barely use commas now.

K18 has been cooking her own meals, Beef Satay last night with some left over for another meal. The other night, one of her flat mates said her pasta dish smelled amazing - all it was was chicken thigh fillet, onion, mushroom, capsicum and spoonful of pasta sauce and cheese. Quick and easy. The other guys had pancakes for tea.
As I said, it might be the honeymoon period but at least she's learned something from home - we are not take-away people - I much prefer home-made pizzas to bought, chinese takeaway is a treat every 3-4 months and my husband won't even eat fish and chips.
Sorry I've filled up your comments page...my rant is over too. :)

Cheers - Joolz